when did this once peaceful world changed to a one with pornography, pain, lies and so much more bad shit.? currently, i have personal doubts over God's creation. the reason is this grave change in every good thing. is this how "perfect" should be described as.? my doubts intensify whenever i see students hitting each other. or worse still, "COME LAH, I SPAR WITH YOU.!" what kind of thrill do they get in such fights.? i can't understand. although chris once told me that "faith is believing in God when life gives you reason not to," i find it very hard to do so. it's not that i don't believe in salvation, eternal life, a Healer, etc. i totally believe in it. but this current crazy life in newtown is seriously changing me. just today, kenny just punched me in the stomach for a soccer ball, a badminton racket and a plasma television. NO. he punched me for nothing.! given my stature, i didn't retaliate. i didn't want to, and even if i did want to, i didn't have the ability to do so. i don't pass a day without hearing a vulgarity. usually, my record of not hearing one will be so near to success until gerald says one. he is so vulgar that he will use "fucking" instead of "very". like, this girl is very hot. instead of saying that, he'll go this girl is fucking hot. COME WHACK ME LAH.! YOU CALL ALL YOUR FOREMEN COME LAH. CALL 10, 20 MEN I ALSO NOT SCARED. =D

i think that's about all. ): ): ):